Love your husband everyday.

I think I have seen the same look on most people faces when I tell them I have sex with my husband when he wants, how he wants, as often as he wants. Men is always either the look of “wow” or “yeah right” women look at me like “you’re kidding”  I seldom get told “me too” I thought I would explain my point of view as to why.  First, I should start with the obvious question. This has nothing to do with our DD/lg lifestyle. It actually predates it.  So while it is a part of our now exsisting contract it really was just a continuation of what we were doing.  So I think the easiest way to explain it is to answer questions I think you may have.  So for demographic purposes we are in the 35-45 rage I am a few years younger than he is. I work 40 plus hours a week, Daddy works too fulltime. We work opposite shifts of each other. Certain days a week our time is limited. We have kids living with us. Anyone that has read any of my other posts knows I have Trauma history, PTSD, Anxiety, and every once in a while Depression shows up to the party.
That leaves us with reasons so let's start with number one. I find men begging for sex a huge turn off. Therefore; why would I even put my husband/Daddy in a position where he has to beg or even ask for that matter. It just sets the relationship up for failure.  He never has to ask, he just has to convince me. Why? This guarantees me foreplay, and gives him confidence.  Men, we love you but sometime you forget we need this.  Anyway, that brings me to what men need yes, you guess it, sex. Men equate sex with love in a relationship. Key word here is relationship. This is where men get their intimacy needs met, feel validated, and how they feel loved in a relationship. So like how we feel when they write us a nice note, buy a small unexpected gift, absentmindedly reach out and touch us. Men get that from intimate contact. I need to make sure his needs are met. Reason two It eliminates anxiety and conflict.  There are several things that couples routinely fight about Money, Family, Children, Sex. That is a fact, if you could secure your relationship by eliminating one of these why wouldn't you?  When you get into the pattern of the man asking for sex and continually being turned down it creates a cycle of anxiety he's anxious about approaching his lover for the affection he needs, she's worried about another confrontation over sex.  Daddy and I do not have this problem. Reason Three You just feel better.  Really, if we looked at this from a scientific angle kissing, cuddling, sex all do the same thing they release happy hormones into your body. For me this keeps my depression and anxiety at bay. Over all having sex more strengthens your immune system, increases your "feel good chemicals' and strengthens your bond with your significant other. Your mood is elevated and it improves your self-esteem.  Daddy, and I have been at it for so long I actually physically feel meh when we don't. Reason number four I am taking away reasons for him to go elsewhere. Put down your pitch fork I said reason not ability, and I am in no way stating that cheating is an excusable offence. What I am saying is when this occurs in a relationship the most common reason is unhappiness do to a lack of sex, love, physical contact, or feeling disconnected.  I think that if people are going to cheat there is not much you can do to stop them, but I know that I have not supplied a ready made reason for him.  There isn't someone out there that can give him something that I do not. I know that I am meeting his needs.  As if you need another reason number five It just feels good.  I love Daddy very much, and I want to touch him and be touched by him all the time I crave the contact an miss it when I don't have it. Which leaves me to all the questions that people might have. What if you are tired? Well, I am tired, all the time actually, I currently have a temporary medical condition that exhausts me. However, I do not think that there is anything much worse than telling the person you love that you are just to tired to love them. So I put that aside, because right now if I gave up every day I was tired we would be one of those twice a month couples. Not In This HOUSE!  What if you don't feel like it? So I don't have this problem often but I find that within minutes not feeling like it changes to Hello lets do this. Everyone loses the drive, but all the drive does is make to us seek sex, it does not limit your ability to participate or enjoy it. In contrast, you may find it help with the things that are likely to reduce drive stress, anxiety, and low self-esteem.  What I suggest is that if you find the drive is low, give foreplay a few minutes and see what happens. What if you just don't have the time?  We find it, if its a quickie on the kitchen table before work, a romp on the couch while watching our favorite shows, or something naughty in a parking lot before shopping. We find the time, each and every day. What about kids/family/friends don't they get in the way? Only if you let them. At minimum Daddy and I have one date day a week. We don't spend money all the time, we go for hike, have a picnic lunch, just go for rides as long as we are together. Too many people equant dates with money that's not the case at all. Also look into a cheap get away like camping, you can get a campsite for $15-$20 per night. Most camp grounds have swimming, hiking, fire pits and no wifi. Even if you only get away for a couple hours it's time. Can't make that happen? Then set aside you time at home, even if it is 30 minutes after the kids go to bed to cuddle on the couch. You have to make your relationship a priority because no one else in your life will. Something that people have said to me was "it seems like you don't have a say" not true. Daddy has a gift and at times I feel his gift long after he's given it to me, and if you multiply that several time in a day sometimes the fourth time will hurt in a not so good way, so I explain that I'm sore and we cuddle. The same goes if I'm sick, or injured.  That being said I always give Daddy a reason instead of a "No" while it does not happen often "no" is dismissive and makes people feel they are not wanted, or leaves them to figure out why you don't want them.  An explanation is more of a way to say "it's not that I don't want to, its I'm sick" and I'm not talking about the habitual head ache here.
So all that out there I do understand that this is not for everyone and there are circumstance that prohibit people to be as active as we are. This is only my perspective on our life. I do think that living this way makes us both feel happier and secure. I also know that our relationship is strong enough to handle if we had to change the way we do things.   I do think that if people are able this is something they should consider trying even if its for a little while. It might just improve your relationship.

conversation with no one

I am lost in a grown up world. Stuck on adult mode. Seems like we have been forgotten or tired of little lady.  What happens when you give willingly, when you make it easy.  After a while there is less   Effort, and no one wants to play. You find yourself alone again, and she, the part that keeps you sane. Just put her away for now. You know this, the adult world. You can do it go with the flow, follow the steps, be rewarded with the grown up title. It’s okay, no one can see the part of you that slowly dies away.  I feel the loss, I feel sad for her. Always bright and shiny at first, but the novelty is gone now and she’s no longer needed. Time to grow up little lady. No one has time for that, not once they realize how easy it is to get to the finish line.  I’m sorry Sally, too much work and there’s tv to watch, and the internet isn’t going to troll its self.  No control, just chaos Silence everywhere , I wonder how I haven’t burned a hole in your head from staring at the side of your face for hours. It’s fine, you don’t see me anymore. I can slap on a complacent smile, and scream on the inside.  Should it have been different? Can it ever be? We are only creatures of our habits. We will watch things burn while holding the matches wondering who started the fire.  I started the fire. I have fully, and easily given you what you desire. Now, years have past, and like a clock I tick as expected when I’m expected.  Just show up I’ll give you the time. My only need is to please you, make you happy. Make a list of my faults while you chip away at the little I’m given to meet my needs. I’ll be whoever you want me to be, as long as you smile for me. I don’t have needs, that’s a myth. After all I’m a woman my only need, my only purpose is to please you.  What? Oh no dear I wasn’t saying anything, go back to watching your show.

Sally gets Married

On September 6, 2017 I married the love of my life. Someone who accepts me for exactly who I am without expectation for me to change. I was not scared or nervous. I never felt more certain of anything in my life. This man is my best friend, my lover, my Daddy, my whole heart, my smile. I love him so completely.  The day was perfect, and he even took the time to whisper something dirty in my ear.  It has been a smooth journey, I know some people would be saying wild or rough but that only applies to out bedroom activities not our life. We compliment each other so well and while we are not perfect we happen to be perfect for each other.  As I studder through vows trying to keep from blubbering like a baby, I am impatient. I cannot wait to to be his in every way, and I want him to be mine. There room is full but he is the only one I see, it's just he and I.  Finally, I hear the words I have been waiting for and we are married. ❤️ The rest of the afternoon is a blur, pictures and well wishes.  Cupcakes, and kisses. I am still in awe that I can love another human being this much. I know that I am beyond lucky. When I look at him I see pure love and think I might just bust with all the Feelings I have for him.  I want to spend every day of the rest of my life with him. We match each other so well sometimes it's scary.  I am so very happy.  <3

Somewhere in the middle

Daddy and I have been on a journey through life together. We had drug ourselves out of the terrible relationships that we once knew and managed to find each other. Part of this journey is our path in BDSM as Daddy and Little. For me I struggled with the little title because I do not fit all the stereotypes. Don't get me wrong I love stuffed animals, and I will put some pigtails in with the snap of Daddy's fingers if he wants to play slutty cheerleader, and douchey football star ;) However, I have no desire to wear them all the time, or color, drink from a sippy, etc. If others do that is fine. However, I have found through additional research that you can be a Middle (12-17 age range) which is still considered a little just a different age range. That was a relief. Middles tend to be a bit more mischievous which gets them into trouble with Daddy a little more often. They enjoy older activities such as movies, dates, shopping, going for walks, going for ice cream, and gaming.  They tend to be more flirty than a little, and a have higher sex drives. So I'm a little that's stuck in the middle and that is okay. 

Part of this journey for me is trusting another human being enough to not question myself. I understand that what Daddy says is final, I struggle, occasionally, with the fear that comes with trusting another person with well your life and all the decisions. It is a difficult task for those of us that are new and have not lived like this for that long. I have only ever depended on myself, I find at times I'm second guessing myself. I want to be good and obedient, but the bratty nature of being a middle gets in the way at times. I know this is just something I have to continue to work on as time goes on. I know that it can't always be easy for Daddy either to know what to do with me when I am struggling. It is important to take the time to learn about your roles and don't just dive in assuming you know it all. Just as it is important to talk to each other and work it out. 

Middles like little's need clear boundaries because they will wiggle through if you leave wiggle room. This is an important part of being a Daddy is making sure you are giving information and not just short answers. I personally do better if someone talks things through with me instead of being dismissive. If I don't feel things are resolved I instantly go into defensive mode. I have learned the hard way unresolved issues can come back later. In the absence of resolution I spiral. I'm not certain how to handle myself, or if the issue will creep up later. This make communication even more important to me. I need reassurance everything is going to be okay.  

Adding little things to your big world.

I love my little self :), more accurately I am a middle I favor more teenager like traits.  For so long I have hidden my little. While she is very much a part of me even in the community that should accept Daddy and I there are those who just do not get it. I feel even if I stand on a box an shout "this has nothing to do with pedophilia!" there are those who will still shake their heads and wonder why I would want to pretend to be five and bang my dad. **Sigh** This isn't about that though. For little/middle like me you know that there is this stigma in the world, and it is hard for people to see the real dynamic at work here. This means that it is even harder for us to bring pieces of our little lives into our big worlds.  It is super hard being adulty so much is expected especially if you have a high stress job. I have been looking for way to represent my whole self in my daily life. So I have looked into ways that I can sneak things in. I love music, and I have very cute headphones that I take to work. It isn't anything that anyone would notice. So when I am stressed at work I can put them on and listen to my music. It little space but on an adulty level ;)

 So the big day is coming and I am of course talking about the wedding. My wedding to be exact, and I have spent some time trying to figure out how to sympathetically blend both worlds. I have a huge family, so it cannot be obvious. I was able to fine the cutest Mary Janes! They are red and they have the cutest bows. The will look cute with skinny jeans, and killer with my dress.  Only Daddy and I will know the significance. It is important to find and maintain a balance. I want to have that part there with us because it is such a pillar in our life. I understand that this may be difficult for some of us. Especially, if you have friends and family that are of the more conservative nature. You do not want to select items that will draw too much obvious attention. You don't want to have to answer a bunch of questions about your Hello Kitty headband at work. Select small trinkets that can easily blend in with everyone else. Take time to look around the environment and see what you can get away with. In example, my office mate has lots of little figurines on her desk, I plan on adding some of my little figurines as well. 

As I get more comfortable in my skin, I find that I care less about the opinions of others. I am happy, and my life feels complete. So why would I leave a piece of my self out?  No one should have to choose what part of themselves that can be in public. 

The Sicky sads.

Any little knows that her Daddy is the big strong protector. This is the reason we choose them to begin with. However, even Daddy's get sick.  This can pose a problem for a little. We are very used to having lots of attention, and time with Daddy. Recently, Daddy was sick for a while, it was all he could do to drag himself to work. When he was home he was sleeping, or very weak and tired.  I tried very hard to look after him and make sure he was okay. Most of the time though I was lonely. Daddy is my best friend and we do a lot together. So I felt a little lost. I read books, took long baths, watched TV, cleaned, and cuddled Daddy while he slept. So when Daddy started to feel better it made me very happy. Daddy could see I was starved for attention so he wanted to play.  While it was nice Daddy used up too much energy and didn't feel great after. Which brings me to an important point when reentering you life after a injury or illness take your time and go slow. Don't try to jump back into where you left off. Your body takes time to recover, and when you are participating in activities where you will be exhorting a great deal of energy remember your body is still trying to heal.  Daddy's are caretakers by nature so I understand that he wanted to take care of me. Sometimes, though a little must put on her adulty pants, and make sure her Daddy is in tip top shape. Remember, kisses and cuddles help people heal, save the rough stuff for when everyone is at 100 %  

Missing Daddy

I remember the first trip I ever had to go on for work. It was 10 years ago and the woman I was traveling with was inconsolable, and I thought that she was a sappy fool. I, on the other hand was 7 years into a bad marriage and thankful for the time away. I had a long list of all the things I was going to do, and enjoy while I was away. There was minimal contact between my ex and I. I spent my evenings rolling my eyes from my side of the shared room, while my roommate's husband was on the phone trying to console her.  She was a mess, and I just did not get it. After all there was a hot tub and no men to boss us around what was her deal? 

Today, I sat in a training and listed to the presenter define "normal."  As he pointed out that there really isn't a normal, as everyone has quirks others might not appreciate, and humans are fluid changing as time marches on. I thought about that first trip.  I have not been away from home long, and in all I will only be gone a matter of days. However, what he said struck me because if I was still the me of 10 years ago I would probably be annoyed with the me I am today. Funny, how the world works isn't it?   

I have to acknowledge that I am an entirely different person now. I am a brat, I am a submissive, I am a little, I belong to Daddy.  As such I have a contract which means my life is very regulated. I work all day long and there I am the HBIC. However, when I get home I submit to my Daddy and follow his rules. I put my collar on, I look for him, we share affection, and greet each other. There is a lot of affection. When you have been a person that was affection starved most of your life, these things become very important. 

So here I am away from him for a hand full of days which feels like an eternity and while there are calls, face time, texts. It does not replace hugs, kisses, and cuddles.  

I find myself feeling lost, lonely, and sad. I just want to go home and curl up in his arms and breathe him in. 

I know he misses me to, I'm just the more emotional of the two of us. So tonight while I am having a bath and a cry the psychologist in me can't help but whisper the words "Codependent" in my doubtful ear.  Am I? No, in love yes, committed definitely, owned absolutely . However, I am strong and independent in my own right.  This made me think about all the people in long distance, or not ideal relationships where they cannot see each other often. How this too must be a struggle.  So how do you deal with being away from your Dom, without losing your mind?

First thing is make sure you make use of your "See you later day"  the day before one of you goes away make sure your spending time together and being affectionate. For me it was cuddles, and kisses. Breathing Daddy in so I can remember his smell.  Secondly,  if you have trinkets that are special to you bring them with you for me this was my ring, my day collar, and my bear. These are all special gifts from Daddy to me so they mean a lot. We made the bear together, I think I may have rubbed his ear off this week. Three, establish a schedule of communication, especially for little as we are needy! Make sure you stick to this schedule, as many components of the relationship are missed out on during this time. Finally, remind yourself this is temporary! 

I know some of you maybe reading this thinking she's whining about a few days, I haven't seen my SO in months. Know that I understand that too, in the beginning the first year or so Daddy and I were together we had a relationship that did not allow us to spend much time together.  We saw each other when we could and it became very difficult to leave him when I had too. Initially, we believed that this would be the way we were going to have to live for a few years, but things changed and he was able to move sooner than we expected.  We have been inseparable since.

I believe that when we have relationships that require such a high level of respect, communication, and intimacy one cannot help but to become attached.  There is nothing wrong with craving the one you love, or longing to be with them. When situations arise that require the one you love to be away from you. Try and stay calm, and remember you'll be home soon!   Missing my Daddy <3 Sally

Time, Love, and Dominance

Very often I come across people wanting information about how to encourage their lover to be "more".  They need more sex, affection, foreplay, kink, noise, orgasms, connection...Just more. The question often comes up is it appropriate to end an otherwise good relationship if there is not a strong sexual connection, or relationship. I am not here to give you the answer as only you can decide what your deal breakers are. What I can do is share some information on how Daddy and I continue to grow together.

In any relationship, including mine, there has to be a core sexual belief system. You have to agree on things like how often, how much, what you will try, what's off limits, and what's important. If you're having this conversation and are noticing right away there are big differences you need to be asking the question: Is there room to compromise?  If the answer is no then you have already hit your first brick wall.  Now, let me be clear I am not advocating the mass destruction of marriages/relationships where sex is an issue. I am saying as a collective group we do not ask these questions until it is too late and we end up wondering how to back out of a relationship without hurting anyone, or if we can struggle through.

What I can tell you is this I used to be of the mindset that "sex does not matter" not that I don't like sex. I do, a lot, but I was raised that it was not a priority just a pleasant relationship enhancer.  No one ever explained intimacy to me, so it was years before I made that connection. My last relationship was 17 years. We were not sexually compatible, we were not even on the same planet as far a sex is concerned.  He was very "get in, get off, get out" no extras, no kink, no intimacy, no cuddles, no variance in positions, no touching, just no.  

I can give you some scientific facts here. The less you have sex the weaker your bond with your partner becomes. The weaker your bond, the easier it is for the relationship to crumble. It is a major piece of your relationship foundation. The same is true for kissing, touching, hand holding, or frequent sex without emotional connection. When lovers do not meet on the sexual playing field the first crack in their foundation occurs. When I was taking human sexuality in college my professor would say "A good sex life can make a bad relationship last years, a bad sex life will end a good relationship within months"  So for me, I didn't know better. I was in a bad relationship, with bad sex for years. 

So where did this lead me? To my very first sexual conversation in my life at 36 years old with Daddy. Who had a also had a mismatched partner the first time around.  So we have had many conversations over what was important. In the beginning it was important to have the lights on as we were both condemned to dark only.  It was important for Daddy to not have to "beg" and equally as important for me to be with a man who does not ask.  Silence was not going to work for Daddy, and I was sick of being quiet. We both wanted to try new things but were very nervous about it. 

At the core we agree and are the same, which made everything else sort of easy. I say sort of because I am leading to the next part of my blog which is time and effort. So lets say you have the conversation and you try things and your partner is moving at a speed that does not make you happy then what? Well, you be encouraging, and wait.  Daddy did not just show up one day with his spanking hand warm and ready to go looking at me and saying "little needs a spanking". He didn't know he was a Daddy, I didn't know I was a little. We stumbled across it and we learned. 

Before the life style our sex life was already phenomenal. We have always had a strong physical and emotional connection. However, in the beginning Daddy was not certain he could be the Dom, I was not certain I could submit.  So we took our time and started slow. One thing as a time, then we talked about it after, assigned it a number value, and determined its standing in our lives.  I cannot hammer communication home enough. If there was something we are working on the other is encouraging, but never pushy. We don't get frustrated with each-other.    

This is important because a person will shut down if they receive a lot of sexual pressure. Unfortunately, we live in a instant gradification society where everyone wants everything now! We forget what a huge change this life style is for some. Some of us are ready to jump in both feet; some of need time to gather information, learn, process, and figure where we fit. This is what most of us struggle with. Because while there is a couple core, there is also the human core. What a person is or isn't when we strip away the layers. 

In the beginning Daddy was just my love, and he thought he wanted me in control. I knew better. He had been long oppressed by all the women in is life and thought that is how we  all were. That was what he knew. Years later, he knows he cannot be submissive.  I thought I could never be submissive, I for too long had people reign over me with power they had taken, not earned. Today, I know my place is to submit.  As most of us in the lifestyle we continue to learn, grow, evolve. 

For the past couple years I have been building Daddy up. I continue to encourage him to assert his dominance. He has done well, there are things he had to do on his own time, like me he struggles with the play that might cause a marks, or is painful. In example, hair pulling he would start and stop himself. For me I am a feisty vixen I bite and scratch. Seeing the marks after make me feel bad so I restrain myself and he encourages. 

Today, after he gave me his "come take care of Daddy" order he grabbed a fist full of hair and used his handle to guide me.  Afterwards, he said how much he liked it and I was happy he finally got over the hurdle. My point is boys and girls it takes time. Especially, if this is something new, and out of ones comfort zone. Allow your partner the time to find their footing in this new world. Be supportive, talk to them, be encouraging, but don't expect them to move at your speed.  It will be worth the wait I promise.  Remember, it is your life style and what you are comfortable with. There is no mandatory handbook that must be followed to the letter.

Daddy, to me is a king among men. It is my job to help keep my king on his throne.  It is your job to support you partner to grow as well, as long as your core is the same. You have to have some common ground to work on. Daddy has said it best, if the person your with does not meet your sexual needs, but is a wonderful person. Let them be wonderful for someone else. It's okay to want to have a strong sexual relationship with the person you love, and if that part of the relationship is not there but you stay just for the love that's okay too. We are often looking for answers from others, when most of the time we already have them but are to afraid to face the truth.  I have posted a link below for the dominant/ submissive checklist. It is the best place to start and find a core to work from.  <3 Sally

http://www.differentstrokes.co.za/store/img/cms/DSChecklist.pdf

Outdoor adventures

Daddy and I tend to be a bit adventurous. We like to be outside, we enjoy the sunshine, the fresh air, the blue sky, and trees. We have a bit of a habit of marking our adventures with a orgasm, well for me at least. Its not always safe for Daddy to take the anaconda out. I make sure to always dress so that Daddy and slip in and out unnoticed.  However, it is always fun when Daddy can have as much fun as I am!

There have been a few times were we have been able to pull off joint ventures in example we have taken a quick romp behind a tree at a park during the winter. We have christened the hood of my car on a hot summer night. We have made love under the stars while a family of opossums have watched. 

Very recently took the pleasure in the beautiful day we have had here. Up north the summer is short and slow to start. However, we were blessed with a beautiful sunny day recently.  Daddy calls me out to the back yard (it's private) and says let's lay in the sun.  So I go out to the yard and realize quickly Daddy has others plans. Soon we are rolling in the cool grass with the sun on our skin. It is slowly and sweetly that we love each other at first.  Then Daddy rolls me over and smacks my ass a good one.  With the sun on my skin I enjoy the rhythmic pounding Daddy delivers. The sound of  the birds singing, the breeze blowing through the trees. The feel of the grass between my fingers. It was wonderful on my senses.

A need for submission.

I have a need and it is strong. I did not know it until recently. I am a submissive, well at least at home. I spend all day making decisions, dealing with stress and pressure. I would have to say part of the need stems from there, but there is also a large part of me that craves the way things were in a time long ago. Where men were men and treated as such, where women were treated with respect an decency. We have long ventured away from that way of thinking. 

Even as I see others like me there are those who are hanging on so tightly to this ideas of what being submissive is and isn't. Like Polyamory, submission predates  today's norms. However, it was not seen as a kink, or fetish it just was the way things were.  It was common for one person to be at home in service to another. This person was usually the woman, and it was her duty to make sure everything was taken care of for the man of the house, and look after the children. She was expected to follow certain rules, and live by certain standards. 

As year progressed we got away from this and entered every man, and woman for themselves. Traditional gender roles were eradicated women mirror men in a lot of ways and started to take offense to things that were normal for our grandmothers. After all how dare he tell me  he's uncomfortable with the fact I have a dozen male friends. When I was young my grandmother told me "Once a woman is married she has no business making new male friends that aren't associated with her husband"  When I asked her why she stated "You don't invite a fox into the hen house"  

If you say this today you will find a great deal of women will disagree and start a rant about no one telling them they can't have friends.  I understand the premise, its just not for me. When I thought about my relationships I often thought about my grandparents, and how they were married until death. If the way they did things back then is so wrong, why is the divorce rate higher now?  

Please don't think I am judging anyone, I too was once a rebellious woman with a man trying to hold me down and I fought him every step of the way. Now we are divorced. I need to say its more so because he was abusive, and I would not relent to his abusive ways. I fought against is dominance that was not given or accepted by me. So for safety purposes I fought back. 

Today, is a different day with a new me living in it.  I know that I prefer a more traditional role based relationship. Where the man is the man and treated as such. I enjoy the freedom that comes with not having to make every decision  on my own. I like having rules, and orders. I love that there is no sexual frustration in my relationship. I think that it is good for both of us to know it will just happen when Daddy and I thinks it necessary. I love that there are rules that demand we are loving and affectionate to each other. 

I need to be submissive because it takes away so many worries. I feel safe and secure. I don't have to walk on eggshells wondering if I have broken a rule I don't know about. They are all written down for me.  I know that if there is an issue we will talk about it. I love that he takes care of me and I take care of him. I feel wanted and needed, and while he his powerful in his own right it is me that has all the power. I need it to feel loved, wanted, safe, and secure. 

Traveling with Daddy

There was an article that said couples that have trip/vacation sex have healthier relationships. I would have to agree. A few weeks ago we had storms and out of the clear blue Daddy says lets go to a hotel. So we did and it was a nice treat. We had the night to ourselves, and I took the next day off of work. We snuggled and watched TV. We obviously left the bed very dirty for the maids. 

There was a mirror in the room which was in a bad position but still nice. However, I was in a rush so I did not pack any special toys, or play items. Which got me to thinking I would do a blog about being prepared and traveling.  This is because at about the third round Daddy asked if I brought things and I did not. 

So get a small zippered travel bag and fill it with your favorite small toys and lubricants. Don't forget to bring something to make you feel sexy. Lingerie is not as much for Daddy as it is for me. I just always feel better  and more confident if  I have something pretty on. Daddy always compliments me.  Remember to relax and leave work, kids, school, life stress at home. Take time to really enjoy each other. Spring for the Jacuzzi tub. In most cases its not much more and well worth it especially for after care hot baths.  Make sure you reconnect. Take a little bit to talk and just be with each other. Share a dessert, take a bath, or snuggle.

<3 Sally

You're gonna have to get naked!

Pain, we have all felt it. The absence of a parent, the rejection of a lover, the betrayal from a person who you thought you could trust. So in an effort to protect yourself  you put up a wall. Every time someone hurts you they hand you a brick to add to the wall. Some of us are lucky to have a short wall that the right person will jump right over and take it with them. Maybe, your  pain was enough to drop you, but not cripple you. So you get up and move on, and the next person hurls themselve over that wall with ease and you skip off into the sunset 🌅. Let's take a moment to wave to those 6 people. 

For the rest of us, or for this blogs sake maybe just me. I was abandoned by my father, abused by my stepfather, given away by my mother, and then abuse some more by a lying, cheating, manipulating, womanizer. Therefore; I have erected the Great Wall. I built it with iron, I sealed it with ore. I was sure I was safe behind it and no one would every get in....safe....until you meet that person you want to let in. 

I was very apprehensive to let someone in, Daddy demanded it more than he asked. It was, and continues to be a real struggle. Being nude in front of someone is a lot easier than being naked. Please believe it is not the same thing. If you're nude they're just looking at your body. If your naked you're vulnerable. They can see your weaknesses, play on your fears, and heaven help me gain trust.  Trust is the most precious currency we have. It takes years to build and you can lose it all in a second. 

I knew I had to be naked with Daddy. There were obstacles though every once in a while I was handed a few bricks to replace the ones I had taken down. However, relationships are work if you can't do the work then you don't belong in the relationship. So I had to get naked. I had to share my pain, my trauma, my past. I had to deal with some pain that Daddy had inflicted and move on. It is not easy, when you love someone so much and they hurt you to not group them in with the others.  He is not like the others though and remembering that helped. 

Many times we wonder how we can communicate with the people we love?  When you have been burned so many times it's difficult to bring yourself near the fire.  You have to you have no choice but to strip away all the armor, stand exposed, and trust that this time you have it right. You're going to have to make the decision to trust someone, and give them the ultimate power. The power to hurt you. I know it is terrifying, and not something that can be done on day one.  The only way to have a healthy relationship is to get naked and let your partner see who you really are. 

Only Love

You can’t blame gravity for falling in love.

—Albert Einstein

I was blessed with one of those Aunts with a dirty mind, no filter, and a foul mouth. I hope to be this type of Aunt one day. Anyway, she was our go to for all the information we were not suppose to have as children.  The first dildo I ever saw was on her night stand, there were hand cuffs on her bed. I remember thinking that's one way to get out of a ticket. My aunt spend a lot of time with us kids, and she was a wealth of information. I remember her telling my cousin and I after she had just been through a break up "It's alright he was just a fucker" and she meant in the literal sense. She continued to explain to us "there are a few types of men in this world, the ones that will fuck you, the ones that will make love to you, but the rare find is a man that can do both. 

A few years later I am sitting on a roof looking at the stars with my best friend "Mike" who is trying to convince me that we should be each others firsts. All I can think though is "Is Mike a fucker" Now, don't get me wrong all of us enjoy a good fucking. However, I had no intentions of spending my life with a fucker, let alone giving up my v card for one. Kisses was all Mike got. We still are friends and I don't regret the choice. If I had to assign the title of the v card taker to anyone it would be #1, I was 19, he was nervous. It was over before it started.  #1 was very timid and sensitive, I was adventurous. I would learn that this would be a bad combination. 

Probably the 4th time getting busy I knew I needed something. He was very, painfully slow, soft, and gentle. Every-time, all the time. Now that I know better this would not have been considered making love.  I think he was afraid to hurt me as there was a considerable difference in our sizes. To this day I am not sure though. So a few times in and I am thinking it would be nice to finally have an orgasm. After a long discussion with a friend we come to the conclusion I needed to give out some verbal prompts. Nothing to difficult. "Faster" and "harder" what could go wrong right? Well, apparently you can say it too much and someone will yell at you "I'm doing it as hard as I can" then leave you alone in a room while they go pout.  I never felt anything during that relationship. Not even an orgasm. 

#2 (suitably named) came along when I was 21. I would like to say I was drinking, but I've never been drunk so I have no excuse other than abused girls grow up to be women who are gluttons for punishment, and not the slap and tickle kind. #2 Was a fucker and not even a good one. To be fair, I am sure he had his own issues to deal with, but I never found out what they were. He did not like noise, it made him lose concentration. He did not like anything to wet, because he never got the memo that women are self lubricating.  He did not want to do anything other than what he needed to do to get off.  The one thing I new for sure is that he was incapable of being a real lover. I tolerated this for more than a decade. 

I can remember thinking that I did not know what was worse. Being with a person I liked who loved me, or being with a person I could barley tolerate who fucks me. The answer was it didn't matter I didn't feel anything either way. Same with #1, the only way there were orgasms with #2 was if I did it myself. Time drug on, like the last 15 mins of the work week you keep looking at a clock that doesn't move. Over time #2 slowly whittled away at my confidence, my drive, my desire. Till we were two people who shared a space together. Quiet, never touching, screaming at, but never speaking to each other. Empty, alone, and worn down.  I started to believe everything that was hammered into my head. It was me. 

I was broken, or at least that's what #2 told me whenever we discussed the one sided sex that was taking place. Maybe I was, because I felt nothing. I had long resigned myself to stay because there were children involved. After all it was not their faults I was miserable. Now, I had made it to the youngest one being 15. I was at the point in my life where something needed to change because I could not live this life anymore. I calmly, told #2 I think this is over, we haven't been happy in years. However, I failed to see he was actually happy. Life was good for him I was the one that was miserable. He asked for another chance, and for what ever reason I granted it. I'm going to plead Catholic guilt for this one. 

Then we took the "let's save this sinking ship vacation"   I was alone most of the time. He was in the hotel.  We were gone 10 days, he never touched me. Yes, I tried to encourage him. I was told I had lost too much weight, it made him sick to look at me. It was my fault he couldn't get hard. I just went and cried in the bath tub. I had been through a lot of changes and I had noticed emotions started breaking through. I felt worthless, unwanted, ugly, and lonely. It had been months since anyone had touched me. When we returned home, I was at a gas station being hit on by some random guy. All I could think was "I bet he would touch me, I bet he would take me in that truck and make me feel something" Ladies, and gentlemen  I introduce you to a new emotion.......desperation. 

I would like to say that I am a terrible person, that I said to Johnny truck driver "you want some of this" and the rest is history.  No, #2 always had way more sex than I did. With my friends, my sister, his brother's wife, his best friend's wife, and co-workers (when he kept a job) So by my tally I had 471 free passes. However, I am not that girl. So I went home and said "I thought about banging a stranger today because you haven't touched me in 6 months" I was rewarded with huffing, pushing me down on the bed, and giving me 3 minutes of unprepared, painful sex. He then told me "there are you fucking happy, that should shut you up for a while, but I doubt it will keep you from being a whore."

It was fourth of July, there were no fire works. We fought, I said I was leaving. He asked for a chance, played the guilt card. Told me no one would want me. Pointed out all my flaws. I just admitted defeat and agreed to try which meant I just shut up while he kept doing what he was doing. More time passes and no touching. A person can starve from a lack of physical contact, but half ass pity contact does far more damage I assure you.  I had enough, I left. This time I didn't go back. 

I would like to say the greatest love of my life is my high school sweetheart. Because that story erases #1 and #2 and years of sadness. That is not the case though. However, in my mid 30's I made a new friend. I was in the middle of this life overhaul. I was taking better care of myself, I was starting to feel things. Because, of my past I went through life like an emotionless robot. Not feeling, was the best way to protect myself.  I didn't want to settle this time though and I felt I needed to use my actual feelings this time to not just think, "yeah this will work" for once I actually wanted to feel something. Some people have a mid-life crisis. I had a mid-life awakening. 

My friend and I talk nearly every night. I found it hard to believe there was another human in this world that understands what it like to be lonely, desperate, and affection starved. He is smart. He is funny. He is kind. He makes me feel good about myself. The whole time the demons in my mind are whispering: "He won't love you", "Wait till he sees you naked" "You're broken, nobody wants the broken thing".  I was terrified. What if I am broken? What if I forget the fact that trusting anyone is impossible, the fact that I doubt the fact that anyone can love me, or that I am capable of love. What if I am broken, what if I disappoint him, what if I can't turn him on?? 

The what if's drove me crazy. I was convinced that I was defective. I could not remember a time where I was turned on by another person. Sure, I had a good sex drive. That had little to do with the fact that #1 and #2 had no ability to make me want it. I didn't blame them entirely. I was abused. Wanting sex made me feel bad, being shamed for wanting sex made me feel worse. At the same time I was not ever given the opportunity to work on me either. I wanted sex, I felt bad for wanting sex, I put myself in relationships where I would not derive pleasure from sex so I would not have to deal with the guilt. I know, it sounds crazy. Unless, you have been given the PTSD demon you won't understand what its like to want something so bad, and hate yourself for wanting it, liking it, enjoying it. 

We keep talking, and he keeps encouraging me to come see him. And whats more is I want to see him. I have become addicted to our conversations like a junkie. I suddenly do not feel so alone, and when I get a text from him I smile like a fool. I am fighting this urge to be near him, to breath him in, and I just want to touch him. Finally, the day arrives that I summon the courage, I still don't know how. However, he has offered a hug, and it has been months since a person has touched me. So I go, and a hug turns into a kiss on the neck, which turns in to a teenager make out session. The first thing I notice is the electricity that is running through my body. I am feeling so many different things. 

I would like to say that I was a wild sex vixen that night. However, the demons kept causing me to hesitate. There was no mistake, I wanted him.......BAD.....but that means he's going to touch me, he's going to see me naked, he's going to know I'm broken. Every time I get close these thoughts appear, and I hesitate. He just has the patience of a saint that night. He's being him kind, and loving. I am touching him and I am overwhelms at how good it feels to touch someone. I didn't know I needed it so bad, and he smelled so good.  

I finally let go because I can't keep up with my body going crazy, and my mind finally goes blank. This is notably the first peace my mind has had in a while. We are in the bedroom, clothes are off, and my friend, the show off, decides its one of everything night. He is inside me and makes very quick work of my first orgasm not self given.....followed by another....and another......and another....and one more for good measure. All I can think is oh my god now I really broke it.  I'm not sure what he was thinking. It was an intense night for both of us that's for sure. 

A few months later we are together and for the first hour or so he is Daddy. He owns me, he commands my body to cum and it obliges time after time. He has let his demon out to play with me and I love every second of it. When it is over we are sweaty, out of breath, and dehydrated. Daddy and I have a bad habit.....each other.....we are one of those couples that makes you go "Awe" or "ugh" we are always touching. Kissing is our second language. It's also why we are habitually late, and perpetually side tracked. 

He's kisses me and its like fire in my veins. He plants little kisses all over my face, my neck, my collar bone. He kisses the back of my hands, before he laces his fingers with mine and puts his other arm under my head and begins a steady, tortuous pace. He talks to me tells me how much he loves me, and he kisses me like it might be the last time he ever does. Part of me is terrified it might be.  I am flooded with emotions because for the first time in my life someone is making love to me. I understand what my aunt was talking about. I cry like a baby because, I love him so much, because he loves me. I  cry because I'm overwhelmed with emotions.   Mostly, I cry because deep down I feel like I don't deserve him or his love. 

This still happens from time to time the overwhelming emotion. I understand it better now, some people have loved before. I have not, not really. I cared about people I never felt like I couldn't live without someone until now. My Heart, My Daddy, My first and Only love. I still feel like I don't deserve you. You are perfect in every way. You love my jagged pieces, and never complain when you have to hold them together. I have a rare find and I know that.  I am learning to accept my previous path of misery because it lead me to you. I have enough love and happiness to last me a lifetime.  I Love you so so very much. Thank you for being you. My only Love <3 

Sally Gets A Collar

What a very special day for Daddy and I. The day that the collar Daddy picked out for me arrived from Scotland. Daddy was very particular on what he wanted and we found a metal working shop on etsy that made what he was looking for. He wanted a stainless steel, and a lock with keys. We found the perfect one.  Now  have many other "collars" I have my ring which signifies our unity, I have my necklace that Daddy had custom made for me. Which means I'm not going to run into another woman with one like it. An now I have a home/play collar. I was very excited when I got it. As Daddy placed the collar on me and locked it he said "You get this because you are a very naughty, good girl!" I was so very happy to be possessed by this wonderful man. He keeps the keys on his keychain.  I never though a piece of steel and a lock would ever make me so happy. In case your wondering, I have posted a picture below. It doesn't do it justice I promise you. I look super sexy in it. 

Daddy loves his brat!

I have always been different. I for as long as I could remember liked things that a grown woman should have long out grown. I enjoy picking on the men I was with, singing, dancing around the house. I love books and crafts. I had quite an extensive collection of stuffed animals. I happen to love video games, I could play for hours. I happened to love cartoons and Disney movies. I have a bad habit of sucking my thumb. I was often told by my ex to "grow the fuck up" "You play to fucking much"  "What's wrong with you" and my personal favorite "you're so fucking annoying" 

For years I really thought there was something wrong with me.  So I just stopped. I got rid of my stuffed animals. I stopped  singing and dancing.  I didn't play any more. I did not make things as often as I did.  Gaming and books gave me peace so I kept those in my life despite constant ridicule for such hobbies. Mostly, I just felt depressed if anything at all. It is very difficult to stifle a part of yourself, especially the part of you that you need to feel happy, or anything at all for that matter.  As an abused child I did not have a childhood at all. Something was always missing.

Many sad, lonely years later. I am standing in front of a man and I am doing what he refers to as my happy bounce. And he smiles at how happy I am. I playfully tease him as he tried to grab me. I back away from his reach and he smirks as he takes a step towards me. I squeal and run laughing through the house and he chases me.  I am laughing and giggling the whole time till he grabs me and picks me up.  "What a naughty girl running away from Daddy" 

I am overly worried about being annoying, I need him to tell me often that I am not. I find it terrifying and refreshing at the same time that he just loves me for me. He does not mind buying me stuffed animals, he plays games with me. He loves that I sing and dance. He looks forward to it. Climb on him like a spider monkey and chew on him when I want attention. Never once has he said I was annoying or seemed annoyed by me. 

One day he sends me an article, and as I read it I learn that I am a Middle/Brat. I like to color and do crafts, Daddy and I watch Disney movies, I like to tease Daddy and play, I like my little stuffed animals and trinkets, I bounce, sing, and dance. I pout an am sassy when I want Funishment or attention.  I know what I am now. I am a Brat, and I have a Daddy who loves me. Even when I am a Sassy pants or a snappy turtle. 

I do not feel out of place or alone anymore, but I did start to wonder what if others find out that I am a 30 something that loves stuffed animals, and being chased by Daddy? What if they find out about Daddy? Will they think badly of him? I can't have that. Together we decided that we don't care what people think. We live our lives privately and have not had an issue with anyone finding out. If we did, it wouldn't matter. Is having a kink the worse thing I could be, or do? Worse than lying, stealing, hurting people. The fact that Enjoy spankings does not make me less of a boss, mother, friend, lover. If anything, I am healthier and happier than I ever have been. 

How you know he will be a good Dom.

I think before I knew I was a little, I knew my Jack would be a good Daddy. I did not know what aftercare was. Then again I did not know what Daddy's and Littles were. However, I know that all along there were signs that he was a good and caring man. Ready for a trip down memory lane?  The first time Daddy and I were together was a whirlwind of emotions I'd like to say for both of us. I know it was for me. 

So how did I know. Well first thing that struck me was he was very concerned about my needs.  He constantly checked on me to make sure I was having a good time and okay. This was not something I was used to. I came from a place where "I'm done, you're welcome" was the standard. So to have a man that was not just concerned with himself, just floored me. 

The next time we were together was the same. (honestly that the standard for us now) He added additional cuddles, then he took me to the bathroom and gave be a shower. He washed my hair, he washed my body, he dried me, and redressed me.  He asked questions on how he could improve. He listened to feed back and gave it. Whenever, I have told him about a need he meets it without question.

Now that I have the information I have I look back and realize I knew then he would be a good Dom. Somethings to look for, or strive for.

1. He's not thinking about his wants and needs, because he fulfilling mine. Not that his aren't important. He gets a great deal of personal satisfaction from making me happy, and I him.
2. He wants feedback afterwards.  Good Doms know communication is very important, as are listening skills. 
3. He is always looking for a way to make it better.  
4. He makes sure all your needs are met including emotional, mental, physical. 
5. Aftercare, is completed and successful. More often than not we see aftercare that is what the Dom thinks the submissive needs, and not based on what the actual needs are. In example, Daddy is a bit of a machine so at times we can be active for 45 mins- 1 hour of difficult (four lotus rating karma sutra) positions. Not to mention having multiple orgasms it the equivalent of crunches (I'm not complaining) So more often than not, my body still feels Daddy after he's gone. He makes sure I have a hot bath, or shower. That I eat and drink. Last week he had to put my back in ;).  He gives me massages. He makes sure it's what I need to return to baseline. 
6. He makes sure you're in the right space before hand.  There is nothing worse than running a scene when your not in the right head space. 
7. He uses "We" and not "I"  if he is always telling you what he wants, and your going to do that might be a red flag. 
8. He understands and respects boundries, and hard limits. A good Dom is never pissed at you for saying "no". 
9. He encourages you to grow, and be the best you! 
10. You're just as important to him outside the bedroom. This is important and many people forget. How he treats you outside of a scene is as important as hw he treats you in. 

<3 Sally

Life is short,take the picture, make a video ;P

If you would have told me two years ago I would be the kind of woman that regularly sends pictures and videos to her man, I would have said you were out of your mind! What kind of woman does that? Well this kind of woman does.  So lets be perfectly clear. In my thirty plus years on this earth I had never send a man a picture that would fall under the category of nude, dirty, naughty, or sexy. I was never with a man I felt needed or deserved them. I also did not trust them enough to not rage post them to the internet. So this is where I do my duty as your friend Sally to put this disclaimer out. Do not send picture to people you have met online, or people you don't trust!

So Daddy and I were seeing each other for a bit. One night we are having some phone sex, and I say something about how wet he has made me. He's reply, "I want to see send me a picture" Oh dear, I have no experience, where to I start? So I snap a picture and I look at it. My first thought is does it really look like that, why does he want to see that?? To be sure it looks normal I google Vagina for reference, I immediately regret that decision and determine that some women should not put their vagina on the internet.  Just saying.  Anyway, I want to get it right so I put on my porn director hat.

I want miss kitty to look purrfect.  So I decide on a classy shot with my fingers in it, (the picture not the kitty) and I snap another photo. Dear god my nails are jacked up....Ugh...delete....quick paint my nails...try again.  So I think I have it now, while my nails are drying I again google some ideas for pictures. I want something classy.  So nails on point, check, a few moisturing spritz to the kitty, check, position that is flattering, check and click.....I wonder what that would look like in black and white. As crazy as this seems, I know there are other women that have done the same thing. 

So 25 minutes later I hit send, and while he appreciates the picture he points out the moment is over.  Well shit. All that prep work for nothing? Yes, exactly. All that prep work was unnecessary he wanted to see the moment not sheer perfection. Later, I was thinking to myself do you think guys put that much thought into a dick pic? No, it's hard, click, you're welcome bitch!  I can't imagine a guy, holding his hard dick in his hand thinking "OMG is that a callous, I need to edit that out. 

Women want it to be perfect, I am not sure why. Ever watch a porn? People look at those kitties and they are in rough shape! Any way, a few days later I was faced with a challenge that pushed me to just face reality. I was away for several days at a conference for work. In the middle of a training I was given instruction to excuse myself to the ladies room and send Daddy a picture of "his kitty" who am I to argue with Daddy?  This time I didn't overthink I lifted my dress, and snapped his picture and hit send. I was rewarded with "Sexy" what every one wants to hear. 

A week or so later I wanted to surprise Daddy and I made him a video, I used some of our favorite props, and just let go. I am proud to say a few years later he still has it. I have learned to play with lighting, use stands, and just let go. We worry to much. This person sees you naked, they know what your intimate parts look like, they have seen your "O" face. A video is no different.  If you are nervous start small. Start with a picture, or a short video. I also recommend you watch it as it can be a confidence booster.

Which brings me to the next topic couples videos. These work wonders for self esteem, and confidence. The first video Daddy and I ever made was because he wanted to show me what he got to hear and see while we were in the reverse cowgirl position. I struggle with how noisy I feel I am. I have body image issues because I used to be very over weight. So he recorded while I did my thing, then we watched it together. Ladies and gentlemen I'm a fucking porn star. I mean I was turning myself on.  More recently we made one because Daddy wanted to see my face when he hits it from behind. First let me say, put the camera in front of you and neither of you will have body image issues. 

The angle was awesome, and Daddy looked sexy as fuck doing his thing. I on the other hand have "This is the 4th time this evening I've been banged" hair, and a red flustered face. As we watch it I point out if I was a real porn star my hair would be perfect and make-up on point. Daddy is quick to tell me that's why he doesn't like the fake porn, that's not what it's like in real life.  You're sweaty, you're red faced, you're out of breath. Sometimes your porno moans sound more like a goat begging for food. Sometimes you say things and they don't make sense. That's okay because it is real. Make it. Watch it. Complement each other. Delete it (or save that's none of my business) 

The moral of the story is life is too short to be anything but wild, crazy for each other, and happy. Take pictures lots of them. Make videos. Learn from them, gain confidence. Be naughty, take a chance, try something out of your comfort zone. Besides who doesn't like to watch <3 Sally 

Sally finds a kink.

I was just hanging out minding my own business when Daddy walked past and gave me a full force crack on my ass. I let out a yelp and a shudder. I literally felt like a volt of electricity running through my body. I remember thinking that is weird. I had never had that happen before. Daddy, of course picked up on it right away. He said to me, "you have a spanking fetish" I blew it off and told him that I didn't think that was accurate. Later that night I know I definitely wrestled with the idea. Do I like it? How weird is it that, I a person who had been abused my whole life now enjoys a good slap on the ass?  I shrugged it off, after all maybe it was more of fluke? Maybe, it was just the idea of being touched by him that did it.

Daddy as always has been more than eager to test my boundaries and push me to accept new things. Especially, when I am having a hard time admitting that I like something. I have long struggled with guilt when it comes to sex, or anything that brings me pleasure. It's as if I need to continuously punish myself because I feel I don't deserve good things. Besides that I am a good Catholic girl and good Catholic girls do not like spankings. I digress.

A few days later I am talking to Daddy and he tells me "tonight I'm going to put you over my knee and spank you, and your going to masturbate while I do it!"  The dirty school girl in me clapped her hands a squealed with glee, and my nun standing behind her with the ruler was frowning in disapproval.  I told Daddy, that's weird! Daddy goes full on challenge accepted.

Sure enough later that night I'm walking past him he grabs me, throws me over his knee, and pulls my panties down.  He tells me to diddle my skittles ;P and with in the first few seconds he lays a respectable crack across my ass cheek. That same tingle surges through my body. He then does the same on the other cheek, and it is pure bliss. Now, I would like to tell you that I am one of those respectable ladies, who took her time and denied her self gratification.  However, I'm not going to lie to you. The 6th smack done me in. Daddy sat me up and smiled, he said "you like spankings its your kink."

I think like anyone else I wrestled with the idea of liking something that is not meant to bring you pleasure.  Daddy means business when he hands out a spanking, and on my sassiest days he becomes the Ike Turner of ass slaps. I love every stinging moment of it. I am at the point now where I am comfortable saying that I have a spanking kink. Many people struggle with accepting who they are and what they like. There are many reasons behind it.  Past trauma, religion, social stigma, guilt, or and overwhelming fear you're just not normal.

I struggled with a lot of these feelings. I was hit all my life, now it gives me orgasms what the fuck? I came to the conclusion that it is not the act as much as it is the feeling, or the release.  I had pain attached to love, kindness, and consideration. I needed that. He was not trying to hurt me out of evil or spite. Because it was him I felt safe, and I was able to attach good feelings to pain and orgasms. This had always been a struggle for me. Having one orgasm was a miracle in the past, and I always felt bad about it because My first introduction into sex was as punishment.

I never had a person who was more than eager to meet my needs, and emotionally support me after.  It was very freeing, and a complete show of trust and commitment to Daddy on my part. I am sure if another man had tried that it wouldn't have turned out so well. However, we talked before, he checked on me during, and we talked after. He assured me there was nothing wrong with me and he liked it too.

I have enjoyed my spankings since that day. We have tried a variety of things, but Daddy and I prefer his hand. I like the skin on skin contact. Daddy doesn't like any thing that marks his baby up <3 I am okay with that.

Sing for Daddy

This is a record of a scene where Daddy encourages me to be verbal. I have provided a little back information of the conversations proceeding the scene. I have struggled with finding my voice and being comfortable with talking during sex, and being vocal. This is how Daddy helped me grow. 


"Can I ask you something?" "Sure you can ask me anything." What's your kink?" "My Kink?" "Yeah, like everyone has a kink, a fetish, something they like/want during sex what's yours?" "Oh I don't know I guess if I had to say anything, I link to be held down or tied up." "You?"  "I like it loud, I like verbal women"   In the beginning Jack and I were just friends. We talked every night. If I'm honest I became dependent on it. After talking for a while we started to ask more personal questions. I think deep down we both knew where this was going. 

So we had the kink conversation. I don't think either of us knew enough at the time to really have a list of kinks. Our experiences were matched at limited at best. The difference is that he had an idea of what he might want, and I really had no idea. My experience was limited to a man that didn't like to be touched. He rarely touched me aside from connecting the parts necessary to complete the act.  Noise "distracted" him so I was not allowed to make it. I would say that calling my previous life vanilla was a compliment. 

So I'm reading his message thinking well noise I can do that. Flash forward a few weeks, and years of programming is taking over. He continuously tells me, "let me hear you"  and I want to I really do. A steady stream of pervy little things, and requests run through my mind.  At the same time the reins of being ordered to be quiet for years confine me. I am conflicted. Are all men distracted if women are to loud?  If he wants it I should oblige him right?  

I am on the table and he is in front of me. He has developed a sweet pounding rhythm that wonderfully taps my sweet spot. The feeling is amazing I lose myself and I notice I have become very loud. I become self-conscious instinctively waiting to be scolded for ruining someones good time I cover my mouth to stifle the moans.   He removes my hands and reminds me he needs to hear me. One orgasm later I am sure the world can hear me and I again cover my mouth. Through gritted teeth, he tells me "let me hear you" and moves my hand again this time pinning in to my thigh with his hand. 

He has the power to control my body, which is no longer mine, and only complies to his demands. So I let go because its what he needs and I am in sensory overload from the activities of the evening. He has taken his time to push me to to the edge where I am so sensitive, even a breeze is enough to send me over. As I have one last exhausting orgasm I sing his praises loud enough to make him proud, and so he will understand the effect he has on me. Then I immediately apologize for being too loud. Daddy of course scoffs at the idea.  

I am dehydrated, My legs are shaking.  He calls me to him to get a drink and snack.  I make my way over to him and drink. I set my drink on the counter, and I kiss his soft lips. He grabs my shoulder spins me around and bends me over the counter.  He hikes my dress up over my hips, and with a swift movement lands a firm smack on my ass. He leans down and in his low gruff voice says "you don't stop yourself from making noise, you let Daddy hear you." **Delivers another smack***  "Do you understand?"  "yes"  "yes what?" "Yes Daddy"  "good, now you owe me four more orgasms and I want to hear you, if you hold back we will start again" ***A third sweet slap***

He works me over again. Because he know my body so well he makes short work of one, two, three noisy orgasms. He begins to work on the last one. He is behind with one arm braced across my collar bone, and the other working slow circles on my button. He bites my neck and then whispers a command in my ear "Cum for Daddy!"  Of course my body is his so it relents to him.  I however, know this one is strong, so I bite my lip and stifle the scream. "That one doesn't count" he starts again. This time I have learned my lesson. I don't bite my lip, I stifle nothing. My knees buckle, and the neighbors are offended by the stream of screaming obscenities that leave my mouth. 

I follow his orders and I pay him his dues.  I am rewarded with a drink, snack, cuddles and praise. I now make as much noise as I like.  Speaking is difficult at times, but it is more of a condition of my senses being overloaded than the lack of desire to do so.  I am thankful that Daddy took the time to work with me to help me reach my full potential. 

<3 Sally