I was just hanging out minding my own business when Daddy walked past and gave me a full force crack on my ass. I let out a yelp and a shudder. I literally felt like a volt of electricity running through my body. I remember thinking that is weird. I had never had that happen before. Daddy, of course picked up on it right away. He said to me, "you have a spanking fetish" I blew it off and told him that I didn't think that was accurate. Later that night I know I definitely wrestled with the idea. Do I like it? How weird is it that, I a person who had been abused my whole life now enjoys a good slap on the ass? I shrugged it off, after all maybe it was more of fluke? Maybe, it was just the idea of being touched by him that did it.
Daddy as always has been more than eager to test my boundaries and push me to accept new things. Especially, when I am having a hard time admitting that I like something. I have long struggled with guilt when it comes to sex, or anything that brings me pleasure. It's as if I need to continuously punish myself because I feel I don't deserve good things. Besides that I am a good Catholic girl and good Catholic girls do not like spankings. I digress.
A few days later I am talking to Daddy and he tells me "tonight I'm going to put you over my knee and spank you, and your going to masturbate while I do it!" The dirty school girl in me clapped her hands a squealed with glee, and my nun standing behind her with the ruler was frowning in disapproval. I told Daddy, that's weird! Daddy goes full on challenge accepted.
Sure enough later that night I'm walking past him he grabs me, throws me over his knee, and pulls my panties down. He tells me to diddle my skittles ;P and with in the first few seconds he lays a respectable crack across my ass cheek. That same tingle surges through my body. He then does the same on the other cheek, and it is pure bliss. Now, I would like to tell you that I am one of those respectable ladies, who took her time and denied her self gratification. However, I'm not going to lie to you. The 6th smack done me in. Daddy sat me up and smiled, he said "you like spankings its your kink."
I think like anyone else I wrestled with the idea of liking something that is not meant to bring you pleasure. Daddy means business when he hands out a spanking, and on my sassiest days he becomes the Ike Turner of ass slaps. I love every stinging moment of it. I am at the point now where I am comfortable saying that I have a spanking kink. Many people struggle with accepting who they are and what they like. There are many reasons behind it. Past trauma, religion, social stigma, guilt, or and overwhelming fear you're just not normal.
I struggled with a lot of these feelings. I was hit all my life, now it gives me orgasms what the fuck? I came to the conclusion that it is not the act as much as it is the feeling, or the release. I had pain attached to love, kindness, and consideration. I needed that. He was not trying to hurt me out of evil or spite. Because it was him I felt safe, and I was able to attach good feelings to pain and orgasms. This had always been a struggle for me. Having one orgasm was a miracle in the past, and I always felt bad about it because My first introduction into sex was as punishment.
I never had a person who was more than eager to meet my needs, and emotionally support me after. It was very freeing, and a complete show of trust and commitment to Daddy on my part. I am sure if another man had tried that it wouldn't have turned out so well. However, we talked before, he checked on me during, and we talked after. He assured me there was nothing wrong with me and he liked it too.
I have enjoyed my spankings since that day. We have tried a variety of things, but Daddy and I prefer his hand. I like the skin on skin contact. Daddy doesn't like any thing that marks his baby up <3 I am okay with that.
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